“Bottom line is, even if you see them coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does.
So, what are we, helpless? Puppets? Nah. The big moments are gonna come, you can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's
when you find out who you are." - Joss Whedon

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Raindrops of the Heart - By Cassie A. Grzesik

Raindrops of the Heart

Before I knew how to write this poem I grew inside my mom
I knew she loved me every moment - yet, something was very wrong
I sensed her unspoken sadness when her heart would beat at night
I didn’t know just what it was, but I knew that it wasn’t right

I grew and grew and grew inside as my mother cared for me
I heard her talk of “making a choice, picking a family”
One day I listened very closely to what was being said
I heard a word like “birth-mom,” and that my mom and dad weren’t wed

I decided to pay attention, so much going on out there
Different people were talking, families kneeling down in prayer
Mom assured me that she loved me but the question of what was right
Seemed to consume her every thought, she wrestled with it day and night

I knew my mother wasn’t sleeping but I had to get some rest
I awoke to the sound of raindrops as mother held me to her breast
And when I looked around me, I saw the light in my mother’s eyes
Her voice whispered safety and comfort, her touch so gentle and kind

She cuddled me so softly as I took in my new way of life
I felt the love only mother could give, love paid at a very high price
Lots of people kissed me (oh, yes, I must have been quite a site)
Aunts and uncles and grandmas, too…all cuddled and held me tight

I then remembered the soft sounds of the raindrops of the heart
I knew a change was coming…that my mother and I would part
The night was full of stories and the dreams that she wished for me
She told me love is forever, another mommy’d meet my needs

She held me close and I wondered if some day I could love like her
Show her how grateful I really am for the pains she chose to endure
Then the room filled with giant raindrops and hearts were pounding so fast
My mother held me so tightly…into another’s arms I was passed…

Now I’m in a new home with a brother who kisses my cheeks
He holds my hand and loves me, his kisses so gentle and sweet
My mommy now, she tells me, of how our family came to be
About mommy, daddy, and brother and my mother who placed me

Yes, the raindrops of the heart make the most beautiful rainbows, too
I have the two loveliest mommies ever, a circle of love that’s true
And yes I hear another heartbeat that is beating close to mine
Not the mother I was born to but a mother with the same shine
She smells a little different; she too, cuddles me to her breast
I feel safe in these new arms and so I close my eyes to rest

I dream soundly of my first days and the songs that my mother sang
The comfort in her loving arms, a love that will never change
I’m grateful for the choice she made and I promise to live my life
The very best that I know how…as I honor her sacrifice

By Cassie A. Grzesik
Inspired By: Robin Grzesik and Kenzie Nicole

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