“Bottom line is, even if you see them coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does.
So, what are we, helpless? Puppets? Nah. The big moments are gonna come, you can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's
when you find out who you are." - Joss Whedon

Saturday, October 25, 2008

1. First Hand - Intro and Background

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Lincoln and I (Megan) are just beginning the adoption process. Each new step brings us into new and unfamiliar territory. We are people who are fairly comfortable in new settings and circumstances, however, knowing where the next step will take us and what we will be asked to do when we get there, would be nice. To that end, I thought it would be interesting (and maybe helpful) to other couples starting down their road to adoption to hear about the major landmarks along the trail.

So, as we move from one step to the next, I will write a short article about the sight, smells and sounds on that leg of the journey from our perspective. Come along for the ride. The view from our backseat is sure to differ from that of your own captain’s chair, but at least it won’t be the first time you’ve see this twisty canyon road.

A bit of background.

Link and I have one biological son. He is a year old. We have always wanted several children, fairly close in age. When we learned that it would not be safe for us to have any more children “the old fashioned way.” We knew instantly that adoption was the way for us to go.
Link’s brother has adopted two children, whom we love dearly (along with their one biological child.) Adoption has been a great blessing to them, and we have been privileged to be a part of that. Link’s family, obviously, has a tremendous appreciation and understanding of adoption.
Two of my father’s cousins have also adopted children. They were both place with severely emotionally and mentally disturbed children, unbeknownst to them at the time. (I should mention that they were both international adoptions.) These parents do love their children, however, they were not prepared for these trials. The agencies neither disclosed possible problems, nor offered any post adoption support. Naturally, these being the only two first hand experience my family has had with adoption, they are a bit leery. They are supportive, but cautious.

That is where we started, lucky to not feel alone in our desire to adopt, but with one side of the family unnaturally concerned about our decision.

Note: I will tag each of these articles "first hand". They will also be numbered, chronologically.